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Author: Larry Simoneaux
Date:  January 20, 2008

Topic category:  Other/General

Guidance needed.


“Lord, you busy just now?”

“Nope. Be done in a minute. Just putting the finishing touches on one heck of a sunset.”


“Nice piece of work there.”

“Yep. One of my best if I say so myself.”

“Anything special in this one?”

“Blended in a bit more orange in the background and pulled in a few clouds to reflect the light. I’d be willing to bet that more than a few people stop and take notice of this one. Might even get a painting or two out of it if any artists are out and about. Anyway, what’s up?”

“Got a problem in America.”

“What’s new? That crowd’s got way too much time on their hands and nowhere near enough to do. I’ve been watching some of their “reality” shows lately and I’m starting to think that the only thing a lot of folks down there are using their brains for is to keep their ears from smacking into each other.”

“It’s not television but, now that you’ve mentioned it, you might want to take a look at some of the music videos they have. They’re enough to make you wonder if we might need another Sodom and Gomorrah moment.”

“Well, besides that, what’s got them in a lather this time?”

“They’ve got presidential elections coming up and people are asking for advice. Everyone who’s running is saying they’re a ‘change agent,’ that the time for change is here, that change is needed, and that they’re going to change the things that need changing more than any other candidate will change things. It’s got people pretty confused.”

“Wait a minute. ‘Change agent?’ What the devil is that?”

“Big guy, if you don’t know, no one else does either.

“Well, anyone who believes what politicians say in an election year needs more help than I can give them. Besides, I don’t do politics. I’ll admit I helped with the Declaration of Independence and the Constitution. Gave them the basics. All men are created equal. Same law applies to everyone. Life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. How hard can it be to go from there?”

“Pretty hard, apparently. A lot of people have let what they call ‘parties’ think for them for a long time and, now, they’ve got so many problems they don’t know what to do.”

“Remind me again. Why did I create politicians?”

“You said that someone had to manage things while everyone else went about the business of living their lives.”

“Yeah, but I thought they’d pick up on the fact that it wouldn’t be a good idea to let the same politicians hang around for long periods of time.”

“Guess they’re not learning very fast.”

“Not my concern. The last time I really got involved was to teach them a lesson for asking. I sent them what’s his name. You know, the guy in the canoe fighting off rabbits.”

“Carter?”

“Yeah. I had a good mind to make his brother president, but I figured Jimmy would be lesson enough.”

“Still, they keep asking.”

“OK, here’s what you do. Refer them back to my rules. ”

“Right. The Ten Commandments. I remember when you scared that Moses guy gray with the burning bush bit.”

“Gets their attention when I do things like that.”

“We’ve got a problem there, though. Seems like they’re pulling those rules down in public places and it’s taken a toll.”

“Well, they can do whatever they want, but the rules haven’t changed and, for sure, they’re still in effect. You just tell anyone who asks to look and see who’s bent or broken those rules on a regular basis. A person like that’s not likely to ‘change’ no matter what they say or how well you dress them up. And, if there’s no one running who’s toed the line, then they’d better be about the business of finding people to elect who do.”

“Anything else?”

“Yeah. Remind them that whenever things start looking really strange, there’s one simple way to figure out what’s really going on. Follow the money. If they need anything else, they’ll just have to use the brains I gave them.”

“Right.”

“Hey, were you serious about what’s in those music videos?”

“Yep.”

“Get me the guy in charge of plagues and pestilence. I may need a word with him.”

Larry Simoneaux


Biography - Larry Simoneaux

Larry Simoneaux is a regular columnist for The Everett Herald in Washington state. He is a retired ship driver for the US Navy and NOAA.


Copyright © 2008 by Larry Simoneaux
All Rights Reserved.


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